Vegas Recovery Almost Complete

Is it any wonder I'm still exhausted from the Vegas trip? So, the rest of the story in as brief a summary as possible...

The Fountain at the Bellagio, sad to admit it - it is that good. The juxtaposition of the sheer excess of the fountain and the choreography to "Tis a Gift to Be Simple" was more than odd, however.

Yes. I was reduced to taking pictures of bathrooms in famous casinos. It seemed wholesome compared to my surroundings.

In my final hours I was chased by Klingons and the Borg; saw Treasure Island, the Venetian, Casino Royale, and the Mirage; made appointments for future meetings with an embalming supply rep. and the president of a stationery company who assures me he can meet my picky demands on a funeral register book; packed, ate overpriced food, mistakenly ordered a 32 oz. beer (mama's not real good with numbers), did not drink it, and took the red eye back to the Commonwealth.

It was the strangest 72 hours of my life. Next year's convention is in Orlando, another destination I have no desire to see. Then again, I do have family there...

Ten Seconds of Something New

My attempt to capture a fave Vegas moment. Sorry it is crooked.

Classes at Convention

My purpose for going to the NFDA convention was to take classes. I teach continuing education for funeral directors in Virginia. I pride myself on being up-to-date and informed in my course offerings. This convention is how I stay up-to-date.

I took several very good classes. I have yet to take a bad one at NFDA. My flight came in too late for me to attend the Thomas Lynch class, but I bought the recording. I'm greatly looking forward to istening to it. You can see Thomas Lynch on Frontline on October 30 at 9PM, PBS. He ROCKS!!!

I was glad to hear what Justin Zabor had to say about cremation. Justin is part of a family owned funeral home in Ohio. He speaks at conventions on the "F words of funeral service" among other things. Justin and his family are about innovation. He knew his audience would not be 100% behind him on this so he talked about innovation in terms of value.

Essentially he said that the modern funeral consumer has different values than they used to have. They would rather take a trip or throw a party than spend 20 grand on a funeral. The role of funeral service is to offer services that people value now, not the model that is 50 years old. Simple, right?

No, not really. That means embracing cremation and offering other services that more resemble event planning. That means losing the profit in traditional areas and becoming more technologically savvy. And it means making new allies with, for instance, progressive ministers with new ideas about services, ritual, and meaning making. (Justin didn't mention that one, but he doesn't know me yet. He will mention it next time.)

I thought Justin did a great job in saying what needs to be said. He was very gentle and positive in his "Change. Or your butts are history." message. Oh, and I forgot to mention. Justin is on my Men of Mortuaries calendar. And so is his brother. Here Justin is with some of his fellow models. Sorry to the nice man on the right for getting him with his eyes closed.

Best Dressed Person at NFDA Convention

In a previous post on the convention called "Oddly Loving It" I described the sartorial class evident at this convention. I'm a bit old school on attire. I believe the Old Navy aesthetic kills the pulse of your soul. To put it mildly.

There are plenty of fashion nightmares in the funeral biz. But their ratio of snappy dressers to putzes is much better than in the general population. I also think business casual was the worst fashion idea in the modern world, and the funeral homes I work with have no part in business casual.

Now anyone who knows me knows that my fashion sense in how I dress myself is somewhere between Lucille Ball and Cyndi Lauper circa '85. I can spot a gorgeous suit a mile away, though. Do as I see, not as I do.

I saw many beautifully dressed men and women at the National Funeral Directors' Convention showing pride in their profession through their outward appearance. What is truly amazing is that they find gorgeous clothes that can be worn for 14 hours. The best clothes I see on male and female funeral directors are as functional as they are fashionable.

I didn't intend to pick a best dressed person. I was thinking I'd take half a dozen photos of nicely dressed people. Then the holy grail of tailoring walked by me. The most beautiful suit of the convention was worn by Anthony Papavero, Jr. of New Jersey's own Branchburg Funeral Home.

The photo cannot do this gorgeous piece of art justice. The colors called to mind chocolate and hibiscus. It felt softer than anything I ever wrapped my precious newborn babies in. And the cut looked like Versace himself was resurrected to tailor this suit! Gorgeous.

Our man Anthony had it beautifully accessorized, too. His tie probably cost the same as a meal at the Stratosphere, and the shirt... perfect. I know I'm going on a bit, but give me a break. I'm a Unitarian Universalist minister - unless someone dies, where the hell am I going to see a suit like this???

As for our man Anthony, as you can see he is friendly and nice. He is fourth generation funeral service. I met his daddy, and he was also just as sweet as can be. (But the fashion sense is the junior Papavero's forte; the papa is more subdued.) Anthony says that he is always stopped and asked about his clothes. He said that even at the New Jersey convention where they all have access to this kind of tailoring, he gets comments. The guy can dress, no doubt about it. If I should make my earthly departure suddenly, somebody call Anthony to pick out the suits for my entourage of funeral directors.

Anthony, thank you for setting the bar, and for not calling security when an amazon blogger descended upon you with her camera and notepad.

Fremont Street's Little Show

See previous post for "before" photos. These are during the show.

TV Conversion

I watch almost no TV. It's not completely by choice. My husband talked me into disconnecting the cable which took me away from my favorite shows. I just never got around to getting new favorite shows. I turn on the TV twice a month to see what happens. It's always a commercial and I shut it off again.

But then I was introduced to the TV on Fremont Street, Las Vegas. The TV in question is five football fields long. It serves as the roof for a pedestrian mall. There are speakers the size of my refrigerator all along the street. When not on, the TV serves as an arched roof to the mall. It is "ON" every hour on the hour for a "little show."

See next posts for the "little show."

Fine Dining at the Barf-o-sphere

Does Vegas make people crazy or does it just attract the crazies? I'm still not sure, but I am CRAZY for eating a meal at the Stratosphere. For those of you not in the know about Vegasian interest spots, I'll give you the short version.

107th floor

Helicopters flying below you

Fine dining (And Kudos to the chefs, it was a very good meal.)

Spinning floor (They called it a slowly rotating restaurant experience. I say otherwise.)

Why combine heights, expensive food, and movement? Why, why, why?

In my case, you gotta' add death care specialists, though. And they made the evening worth it. Great company. View was wowsie. Thank you VFDA for choosing the spot. But, no joke, I'm getting flashback nausea writing this. Perhaps the blur of the photo will help you to share in the experience.

Vegas Got Me, Baby

I did way too much, and fell behind on my blogging. So I will ask you a favor. I'll start posting the FANTASTIC stuff I did and saw, and you pretend that I'm still there.

Sorry for the delay. Vegas ain't a blogging kind of place. Baby.

(See? I almost got that Baby thing down!)

Other Interesting Funeral Tidbits

It seems the stationery industry continues to be in a rut. The convention hall is packed with cards, programs, announcements, and acknowledgment cards that I can't imagine anyone I know ever using. It doesn't have to be this way, does it?

The good folks at Peka continue to have superior colors in their products, but still not exactly what I imagine the people in my congregations preferring. They were my favorites last year for their variety, vibrant look, and desire for suggestions for innovative looks to try.

This year I salute The Regal Line who are trying to break some tired patterns of the industry at large. They have "Thank you" cards that are decorated by Flavia and have wording completely appropriate to the sentiments of many of my congregants. (When I told the Regal Line representative Dallas that I was UU, he pointed me right to them. Smart man with a great name.)

I also like the Regal Line's multi-cultural offerings, although I recommend that they stop calling them "Ethnic Sets." Immediately.

What I found at the Regal Line that filled a need best, though, was envelopes for memorial contributions. These things are great. I know this is a big yawn for any of you who don't do this kind of work, but trust me on this. Currently, if someone wants to give a memorial contribution they have to send to the charity themselves. Sometimes they come to church with a donation at the service, and we don't have a great way to collect it.

These envelopes have a simple way to collect the donation and have the donor record what it's for, and who gave it. The envelope is sealed so the privacy of the donor's gift is maintained. And there's an adhesive backed label where the donor writes his/her address. That label can then be attached to the thank you card for sending. One less step for a grieving person. GREAT idea.

You may remember from last year my fondness for a good scrapbook. Notable Legacy has one that takes a lot of the work out of it. Many scrapbook enthusiasts like the work part. But most of us end up procrastinating and not getting around to recording the memories. Notable Legacy takes care of much of that for you. They are run by a cute-as-a-bug woman named Jean who can tell you about this better than I can. Follow the link. They are a little pricey, but when you look at the materials list and the binder itself, it is worth it for most of us to not have to go shopping for all the parts and accessories.

Jean also has a sideline selling lacy garters to hide one's ID and money in while travelling. She's a versatile gal. I mention the sideline mainly to explain the photo, though.

Beautiful Urns

Unfortunately, I don't find enough urns that pass the Unitarian Universalist aesthetics challenge. When at the National Funeral Directors' Convention I am always on the lookout for an artisan who does an urn I think my congregation would like.

Here's a delightful craftsman. His name is John Berger and he is out of Albuquerque, New Mexico. For those of you looking for affordable, handmade, natural, and not "urny" looking urns - this is your man. He has great prices. I mean GREAT. And the photo doesn't do justice to the work. They are maple urns in a variety of sizes with tung oil finishes that can be natural or dyed most any color in the rainbow.

This is John's first NFDA convention. If you would like to contact him, he's at johnbergjr@aol.com

No Words are Sufficient

Oddly Loving It

“You are going to hate Vegas.” he said.
“That place is the pus hole of the world,” said another.
Somewhere between the two is where I find myself at this moment after approximately 12 hours in sin city.

Not much to report on the sin side of things. The energy and water waste is abominable. The waste of human potential and spirit at the omnipresent slots and tables is deplorable. The second hand smoke is gag-rageous. But I am not here for any of that, so my spirits are actually quite high.

As a reminder, I am here for the 126th National Funeral Directors’ Convention. It is the oddest thing I do all year. And I love it.

Odd- The opening session began with a gospel choir led by a Chaka Khan look-alike in the most extravagant wedding dress I’ve ever seen. She accessorized with a white feathered hat the size of a wedding cake and a voice that could carve the Grand Canyon. In a good way.

Love it – I’ve already seen a guy in a “Men of Mortuaries” t-shirt. M of M is a calendar that combines beefcake, lessons on the death care business, and funeral director pride. Also falls under odd, but I own a copy of this thing and am glad to see that it has taken off. I’ll pre-order you a copy. As for the guy in the shirt: very cute but I’m not sure he’s your type.

Odd –There’s a whole lot of praying going on with this crowd. Lots of “God bless” and praising going on. And I am saying this as a preacher. If I feel it’s a little much, it is more than a little. I’m also sniffing some ou want to roll out the holy, let’s have the convention in Iowa. In Vegas? Baby, I ain’t buying it.

Love it – The women are all shapes, sizes, shapes and colors. Meanwhile, there is an unbelievable percentage of the men who you’d peg as a funeral director no matter what they did. And then there are my perennial favorites – the Mack-Funeral-Daddies-and-Mamas These folks are styling. Now it is a conservative chic, but it is still chic. And the best part is, I know that the shiny wingtips, silk ties, pocket squares and Gucci glasses are their version of business casual.