Grapevine says that some folks are at a loss as to what study leave is and why I'm on it. That's an easy enough question to answer.
Traditionally, UU ministers had summers off to study because the expectations of our intellectual capabilities were very high and because congregations were able to do alternative programs in the summer. Or so the lore goes in this neck of the woods. One friend tells me that they had no AC at his church, so they closed the church and called it study leave. Another said that it was the 8 week period you were allowed for psychological evaluation and rebuilding. Tomato, maytur, whatever.
At our church in Richmond, summer services were predominantly lay led for many years. The minister was expected to work almost ceaselessly throughout the church year, leave in June to go to the General Assembly of the Unitarian Universalist Association, and then return some time in August. Ministers were also given a paid sabbatical every seven years or so which lasted between 6 to 10 months.
These days, the study leave is often less generous and sabbaticals are no longer a sure thing. The general rule is that General Assembly to mid-August is still paid leave for the minister with the expectation that the minister hits the ground running in August to kick off the church year. At least so it remains in Richmond.
There's a catch, though. I have been at First UU for five years. I have had at least five titles in that time and have worked between 12 hours a week and full-time, depending on the title. I have been the only minister, one of three, and one of two. Last year I worked full-time, but it was at two churches. (And people wonder why I am a little loopy? It is because I can't remember my newest title or newest colleagues.)
Why the constant change? I am a contract minister, not a called minister. I was asked to serve during a time of sudden transition five years ago, but did not go through the search process. Since then, there have been subsequent ministerial needs and I have filled them. But I have still not been "called" to serve the congregation. (In order to call a minister, the position has to be clearly defined, approved, budgeted, and long-term.)
As contract minister, I fill the needs and the needs often arise in the summer. The result is that in five years at First UU, I have never had a study leave. I was out for less than three weeks when my daughter was born (not a great time for study) and I am ineligible for sabbatical. My partner in ministry picked up on this and worked so that I could have my first study leave... now. Yay. Hope that explains things.
Back to our program already in progress.
Day 5 of study leave I learned that I have been UU too long. In looking through my daughter's Dora the Explorer Old Maid deck I thought she had lost the Old Maid card. There was Dora as athlete, skater, conductor, pirate, biker, witch, princess, cowgirl, apple picker, lifeguard, dancer... but no Old Maid. Ten points to you if you have to look back over that list to find the Old Maid card.
I learned that even when you watch one third of the movie in fast forward mode, Sofia Coppolla's "Marie Antoinette" is an abomination illustrating everything that is wrong with entertainment obsessed America and she should never be allowed a budget over $800 for a movie again. (Word up to Molly Shannon, Jason Schwartzman, and Rip Torn, however. You did what you could.)
I learned that the Eagles are harder to sing a cappella to a wandering grandma with Alzheimer's than you would think. I learned that I have a petty jealousy of able-bodied people who can just up and start running. And I learned that eighteen years is not long enough to be married, so I am re-nupping with the man. Happy Anniversary!
Reading: Finished that '04 McSweeney's issue. More of the book with the outrageously long title. Today's paper. A Kroger's coupon flyer full of able-bodied smiling people embarking on their fitness routines with verve. It burnt nicely in the fireplace. A Sesame Street book about Big Steps at bedtime.
Yeah, I know. If you had study leave you would be reading much weightier things, teaching yourself Portuguese, doing daily Tai Chi, and finishing your novella. But we would not like you anymore and no one would tell you when that great band was playing or when the crab dip goes on sale.
Doing it for the crab dip, darlin'.
Tuesday, January 06, 2009
Sunday, January 04, 2009
Day 4 - Study Leave Catch Up
My mother is plotting against me. I came home from our brief foray into the Virginia woodlands to find an email from her essentially saying, "Blogging every day of your leave is stupid. Take a walk with us (my parents) instead."
There has always been something sweet about my mother's plotting. Leave out the stupid part and she is saying, "Dear brilliant daughter, I love your company and hope to see more of your ageless beauty in the coming days." I guess you have to know my mother to believe me, but really: she is saying that.
Discernment: Having parents who love you and show it in healthy ways is an easy key to happiness.
Today I made the study leave to do lists in between paraffin dips and cross stitch. Have I mentioned that a one month study leave is just enough time to get one's frustration up? Again - not complaining, just noting. I think the gist of this whole leave may be learning graceful ways of coming to terms with not living up to my own hopes and expectations. What I don't like about that gist is: it doubles as the thesis statement of the big cosmic term paper I call my life. Why must I fish that sandbar again?
Discernment: Stop chopping vegetables, you nitwit! It makes your hand hurt for 36 or more hours.
Where was I? Oh, yes. D'Angelo.
Do you know that D'Angelo is one of the most overlooked talents of the late twentieth century? How do I know this? He has been the breakfast boogie music of choice this week. Readers - go to iTunes and start downloading now. D'Angelo, I miss you and the kids adore you.
Ok, fine. Busted. I wasn't talking about D'Angelo before. But I should've been. And you should have been, too.
There have been requests to hear the latest installment in the night terrors saga at the house. First, I could have started a blog solely on night terrors with the voluminous response I got to the tale of my 3 year old plumbing the depths of her unconscious and the heights of her vocal range at 3 AM for about a week dreaming/seeing/feeling bugs.
So, in a nutshell... The Top 10 suggestions from readers, congregants, family and friends on night terrors:
10. leave the light on
9. no weird medicines
8. get a dreamcatcher and teach her how to use it
7. help her realize her own power over bugs or other bumps in the night
6. take the bugs' side ("poor little things with a great big girl like you screaming at them")
5. let her brother teach her bug destruction techniques
4. use aromatherapy as part of the bedtime routine
3. teach her science ("it is too cold for bugs. you were dreaming")
2. sleep with her
1. give her bug toys
We did almost all of these things to some degree. What seemed to win out? Bribery. "If you go back to sleep and softly tell those bugs to leave you alone you can have ... in the AM."
Am I a wee bit ashamed? Yes. But bribery was part of a larger program of reason, affection, discussion, and hypothetical bug mutilation with a light saber, so I can show my face at the Unitarian Universalist parenting circle again. (You call it parenting circle. We call it dinner at the burrito place.)
Discernment: Cookies can defeat spooky in a cage match.
As you may already know, I also spent some time today catching up on my "daily" (haha) study leave blog. Sorry, Mama. You walk too fast for this arthritic young'n of yours to keep up.
Reading: No Matter How Much You Promise to Cook or Pay the Rent You Blew it Cauze... (only six thousand pages to go!), Awakening the Buddha Within by Lama Surya Das (a three time re-read), an Avengers comic book as bedtime story, and selected excerpts from today's paper as thoughtfully chosen by my hubby.
There has always been something sweet about my mother's plotting. Leave out the stupid part and she is saying, "Dear brilliant daughter, I love your company and hope to see more of your ageless beauty in the coming days." I guess you have to know my mother to believe me, but really: she is saying that.
Discernment: Having parents who love you and show it in healthy ways is an easy key to happiness.
Today I made the study leave to do lists in between paraffin dips and cross stitch. Have I mentioned that a one month study leave is just enough time to get one's frustration up? Again - not complaining, just noting. I think the gist of this whole leave may be learning graceful ways of coming to terms with not living up to my own hopes and expectations. What I don't like about that gist is: it doubles as the thesis statement of the big cosmic term paper I call my life. Why must I fish that sandbar again?
Discernment: Stop chopping vegetables, you nitwit! It makes your hand hurt for 36 or more hours.
Where was I? Oh, yes. D'Angelo.
Do you know that D'Angelo is one of the most overlooked talents of the late twentieth century? How do I know this? He has been the breakfast boogie music of choice this week. Readers - go to iTunes and start downloading now. D'Angelo, I miss you and the kids adore you.
Ok, fine. Busted. I wasn't talking about D'Angelo before. But I should've been. And you should have been, too.
There have been requests to hear the latest installment in the night terrors saga at the house. First, I could have started a blog solely on night terrors with the voluminous response I got to the tale of my 3 year old plumbing the depths of her unconscious and the heights of her vocal range at 3 AM for about a week dreaming/seeing/feeling bugs.
So, in a nutshell... The Top 10 suggestions from readers, congregants, family and friends on night terrors:
10. leave the light on
9. no weird medicines
8. get a dreamcatcher and teach her how to use it
7. help her realize her own power over bugs or other bumps in the night
6. take the bugs' side ("poor little things with a great big girl like you screaming at them")
5. let her brother teach her bug destruction techniques
4. use aromatherapy as part of the bedtime routine
3. teach her science ("it is too cold for bugs. you were dreaming")
2. sleep with her
1. give her bug toys
We did almost all of these things to some degree. What seemed to win out? Bribery. "If you go back to sleep and softly tell those bugs to leave you alone you can have ... in the AM."
Am I a wee bit ashamed? Yes. But bribery was part of a larger program of reason, affection, discussion, and hypothetical bug mutilation with a light saber, so I can show my face at the Unitarian Universalist parenting circle again. (You call it parenting circle. We call it dinner at the burrito place.)
Discernment: Cookies can defeat spooky in a cage match.
As you may already know, I also spent some time today catching up on my "daily" (haha) study leave blog. Sorry, Mama. You walk too fast for this arthritic young'n of yours to keep up.
Reading: No Matter How Much You Promise to Cook or Pay the Rent You Blew it Cauze... (only six thousand pages to go!), Awakening the Buddha Within by Lama Surya Das (a three time re-read), an Avengers comic book as bedtime story, and selected excerpts from today's paper as thoughtfully chosen by my hubby.
Day 3 - Study Leave Walking
Did I mention that there was a tyke revolution protesting all things slumber oriented last night? There was not nearly enough sleep.
Today held over an hour of hiking, an hour of cross stitch (alternative hand therapy since I flunked out of the hard core stuff thanks to a flare up), 25 minutes of paraffin hand dipping (see previous parenthetical), some reading, and approximately fifteen hours of eating.
Or so it seemed.
As far as my Thoreau-esque enlightenment from my long walk in the woods... didn't happen. I just walked. It was highly successful in other ways. I did not step in mule poop. I did not fall down. Little victories, baby.
Discernment: Cold hurts hands.
Discernment: Food and children are harmless only in tiny doses.
Reading: No Matter How Much You Promise to Cook or Pay the Rent You Blew it Cauze Bill Bailey Ain't Never Coming Home Again and expect to see that abbreviated in further posts because I need a paraffin dip after just typing that monster. The book is also close to 800 pages long and almost 400 of those come after the title is finished.
Today held over an hour of hiking, an hour of cross stitch (alternative hand therapy since I flunked out of the hard core stuff thanks to a flare up), 25 minutes of paraffin hand dipping (see previous parenthetical), some reading, and approximately fifteen hours of eating.
Or so it seemed.
As far as my Thoreau-esque enlightenment from my long walk in the woods... didn't happen. I just walked. It was highly successful in other ways. I did not step in mule poop. I did not fall down. Little victories, baby.
Discernment: Cold hurts hands.
Discernment: Food and children are harmless only in tiny doses.
Reading: No Matter How Much You Promise to Cook or Pay the Rent You Blew it Cauze Bill Bailey Ain't Never Coming Home Again and expect to see that abbreviated in further posts because I need a paraffin dip after just typing that monster. The book is also close to 800 pages long and almost 400 of those come after the title is finished.
Day 2 - Study Leave, stress the Leave
When I said I would blog every day of my study leave I probably should have mentioned that I was about to embark upon three days in a cabin in a national park with my family. No internet access, or so I assume because I didn't want to bring my computer. Not even the new blazin' purple iPod nano.
Live and learn. (About the blog promise, not the joyful freedom from technology.)
I am transposing this from nearly illegible longhand two days after. (Note to self- Day 4 study leave: typed stupid notes from that stupid idea to blog every day.)
{At this point in my notes I wrote a sentence that made absolutely no sense. I think I may see a few of those. I'll be cutting this entry short and you should be thanking me}
{Two paragraphs later...}
... I roasted. I baked. I sauteed. I steamed. We gorged. We toasted. We cleared the table. I wondered what happened to my day.
Discernment: A month is too short.
Reading: McSweeney's again. Turns out I am reading the issue from Early Fall 2004.
Also finally picked up again No Matter How Much You Promise to Cook or Pay the Rent You Blew It Cauze Bill Bailey Ain't Never Coming Home Again by Edgardo Vega Yunque
Live and learn. (About the blog promise, not the joyful freedom from technology.)
I am transposing this from nearly illegible longhand two days after. (Note to self- Day 4 study leave: typed stupid notes from that stupid idea to blog every day.)
{At this point in my notes I wrote a sentence that made absolutely no sense. I think I may see a few of those. I'll be cutting this entry short and you should be thanking me}
{Two paragraphs later...}
... I roasted. I baked. I sauteed. I steamed. We gorged. We toasted. We cleared the table. I wondered what happened to my day.
Discernment: A month is too short.
Reading: McSweeney's again. Turns out I am reading the issue from Early Fall 2004.
Also finally picked up again No Matter How Much You Promise to Cook or Pay the Rent You Blew It Cauze Bill Bailey Ain't Never Coming Home Again by Edgardo Vega Yunque
Friday, January 02, 2009
Day 1 - Study Leave
Let's go back in time. Imagine a simpler time when all the world looked new. Think back... to yesterday.
I am on study leave for the month of January. Some people call these sabbaticals, but 31 days is not a sabbatical. Then again, most people never get a study leave or a sabbatical, so I am NOT complaining. It is my personal goal to either make everyone want a study leave and construct their lives to make that possible, OR to show the world that four day work weeks and early retirement are a better answer. We'll see.
When planning my time off, one of my goals was to blog... every day. Just a little. Just to share a bit of wisdom that day had to offer. I don't expect I'll get a study leave again so, at the very least, this month's blogging could be my souvenir of the experience. All good ideas.
But yesterday I did not blog. Let's not call this an omen, OK? Hence, the time travel back to yesterday.
January 1 - New Year's Day, my husband's birthday, first day of study leave. Isn't that a bit much for one day to have to be carrying around?
We began the day with a 5 family sleepover breakfast extravaganza at a friend's house. Discernment: bacon is good.
We ended the day with a birthday dinner at my mother's house.
Discernment: when other people cook, it is very good.
In typical fashion, I did two hours of work. Oh well.
But why did I NOT blog? Why did I betray my study goals on the very first day?
Discernment: Ricardo Montalban.
Hubby had been saving the Netflix of Star Trek's original series, episode 24 "Space Seed" guest starring Ricardo Montalban as Khan. At the end of the day I could blog or get my geek on. As if that is even a choice. Besides, it was his birthday.
Reading material for the day: old McSweeney's issue and a Burpee catalogue
I am on study leave for the month of January. Some people call these sabbaticals, but 31 days is not a sabbatical. Then again, most people never get a study leave or a sabbatical, so I am NOT complaining. It is my personal goal to either make everyone want a study leave and construct their lives to make that possible, OR to show the world that four day work weeks and early retirement are a better answer. We'll see.
When planning my time off, one of my goals was to blog... every day. Just a little. Just to share a bit of wisdom that day had to offer. I don't expect I'll get a study leave again so, at the very least, this month's blogging could be my souvenir of the experience. All good ideas.
But yesterday I did not blog. Let's not call this an omen, OK? Hence, the time travel back to yesterday.
January 1 - New Year's Day, my husband's birthday, first day of study leave. Isn't that a bit much for one day to have to be carrying around?
We began the day with a 5 family sleepover breakfast extravaganza at a friend's house. Discernment: bacon is good.
We ended the day with a birthday dinner at my mother's house.
Discernment: when other people cook, it is very good.
In typical fashion, I did two hours of work. Oh well.
But why did I NOT blog? Why did I betray my study goals on the very first day?
Discernment: Ricardo Montalban.
Hubby had been saving the Netflix of Star Trek's original series, episode 24 "Space Seed" guest starring Ricardo Montalban as Khan. At the end of the day I could blog or get my geek on. As if that is even a choice. Besides, it was his birthday.
Reading material for the day: old McSweeney's issue and a Burpee catalogue
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