Thursday, January 25, 2007

Martin Luther also known as...

If you are over 14 years of age or serious about your study of Protestant history, I am probably about to offend you. Oh well.

This past Sunday I snuck into our Middle School religious education program. We have a large group and they were in the middle of a lecture on the practice of selling indulgences in 15th century churches. Because of the latter piece of information, the large group looked at me imploringly to save them.

"Please!" their eyes cried. "A fire drill. A sudden emergency choir rehearsal. Save us from church history!"

I had that same look while I was in seminary and no one stepped in for me, so I felt it was my duty to tell them the most significant thing I ever learned in church history. Martin Luther had gas. Call it what you want: flatulence, gastrointestinal distress, irritable bowel... the result is the same and it works well with his name. Think about it. There you go. Got it?

And I wonder why they never ask me to come speak to the middle schoolers? My sincerest apologies to the REAL adults who lead that class every week. Please forgive me for bringing the discussion down to my level. It's a bad case of Post Traumatic Seminary Disorder. I can only hope the students bring this up in their college religion courses, and remember me kindly.

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